No PUBLIC HOLIDAYS on SUNDAYS……………………….

This year has got highest number of SUNDAYS and SATURDAYS……………..

So enjoy the least working year in your life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007 – A YEAR WITH A DIFFERENCE………………………..

Peg After Peg… Peg After Peg……!! MUST READ

I never take risk while drinking

When I come from office in the evening, wife is cooking

I can hear the noise of utensils in the kitchen

Take out the bottle from my black cupboard

Shivaji Maharaj is looking at me from the photo frame

But still no one is aware of it

Becoz I never take a risk

I take out the glass from the rack above the old sink

Quickly enjoy one peg

Wash the glass and again keep it on the rack

Of course I also keep the bottle inside my cupboard

Shivaji Maharaj is giving a smile

I peep into the kitchen

Wife is cutting potatoes

No one is aware of what I did

Becoz I never take a risk

I: Any news on chopra’s daughter’s marriage

Wife: Nope, she doesn’t seem to be that lucky. Still they are looking

out for her

I again come out; there is a small noise of the black cupboard

But I don’t make any sound while taking out the bottle

I take out the glass from the old rack above sink

Quickly enjoy one peg

Wash the bottle and keep it in the sink

Also keep the Black Glass in the cupboard

But still no one is aware of what I did

Becoz I never take a risk

I: But still I think chopra’s daughter’s age is not that much

Wife: What are you saying? She is 28 yrs old… like an aged horse

I: (I forgot her age is 28) Oh Oh…

I again take out potatoes out from my black cupboard

But the cupboard’s place has automatically changed

I take out the bottle from the rack and quickly enjoy one peg in the
sink

Shivaji Maharaj laughs loudly

I keep the rack in the potatoes & wash Shivaji Maharaj’s photo & keepit
in the black cupboard

Wife is keeping the sink on the stove

But still no one is aware of what I did

Becoz I never take a risk

I: (getting angry) you call Mr. chopra a horse? If you say that again, I

will cut your tongue…!

Wife: Don’t just blabber something, go out and sit quietly…

I take out the bottle from the potatoes

Go in the black cupboard and enjoy a peg

Wash the sink and keep it over the rack

Wife is giving a smile

Shivaji Maharaj is still cooking

But still no one is aware of what I did

Becoz I never take a risk

I: (laughing) So chopra is marrying a horse!!

Wife: Hey go and sprinkle some water on your face…

I again go to the kitchen, and quietly sit on the rack

Stove is also on the rack

There is a small noise of bottles from the room outside

I peep and see that wife is enjoying a peg in the sink

But none of the horses are aware of what I did

Becoz Shivaji Maharaj never takes a risk

chopra is still cooking

And I am looking at my wife from the photo and laughing

Becoz I never take what???

ZZZZZZZ zzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzz zzzzz………

Here are 10 additional ways to make life with Windows easier and more productive.

1. If you have a “wheel mouse,” skip the rolling scrolling stuff and turn the wheel into a useful button. I have mine set up to perform a left double click when I do a single click on the wheel button. I’m not young any more, and double-clicking isn’t as easy as it used to be. So clicking that middle button for a left double click is a big plus me. (Your mouse software should let you change the behavior of the wheel. If it doesn’t, get a Microsoft Intellimouse. It has the right software options in addition to being a great mouse.)

2. Give the keyboard a boost. Open the Control Panel (under “Settings” in the Start Menu) and double click on the Keyboard icon. Slide the “Repeat Delay” and “Repeat Rate” controls all the way to the right. This will make the keyboard much faster, and it even speeds up scrolling with the mouse.

3. Click your right mouse button on a file whenever you’re not sure what to do with it. You’ll see a list of choices. This can save you a lot of fiddling.

4. Switch your folders to “Details” view so you can quickly sort the listing. Choose “Details” from the “View” menu at the top of any Windows folder. (Folders are windows that show you what’s in your computer. Double clicking on “My Computer” opens a folder, for example.) Sort the list in a “Details” view by clicking on the heading for that part of the list. Clicking “Modified” sorts the contents by the modification date (latest or oldest first), for example. And clicking again on the same heading reverses the sort.

5. Save your wrist, Part 1. You can do a lot of things easier from the keyboard than by dragging your mouse. Here are three: To put something in the Recycle Bin, select it and press the Delete key; to close a program, press Alt-F4; and to select everything (in a program such as a word processor or in a folder window), press Ctrl-A.

6. Save your wrist, Part 2. Pesky messages that come up on your screen usually can be closed with a single whack of the Esc key. Don’t bother clicking your mouse.

7. Reboot early and often. Windows runs out of its disappointingly small “system” memory pool (called resource memory) all too readily, leading to lockups and crashes. Adding memory chips doesn’t help. Rebooting is the only way to get that memory back.

8. Enjoy a real-estate boom. Get more windows to fit on your screen. If you have a 17-inch (or larger) PC monitor, drop the two drecky screen resolutions and switch to 1024 by 768. (The two yucky ones are 640 by 480 and 800 by 600.) Right click on the desktop and click “Properties,” then “Settings.” Slide the control over to 1024 by 768. If you have a really big monitor, see if you can choose an even higher setting for resolution. One of my 21-inch monitors is set for 1200 by 1024 and the other is set for 1600 by 1200. I wouldn’t switch back to a lower resolution if you paid me.

9. Toss your cookies. We could argue forever over which rock’n’ roll band is the greatest of all time and which kind of coffee is the best, but nobody could argue about the best way to control Web cookies in Windows. The winner by far is Cookie Pal. Don’t leave your home page without it. Get it from http://www.kburra.com/.

10. Down with the load. Make life easier when you download files by making a folder where you can find them. Double click on “My Computer” and then double click on the C: drive. Right click inside the C: drive window and create a new folder with the name “Downloads.” The next time you are about to download a file, RIGHT CLICK on the link and tell Windows to put the file in the “Downloads” folder. All subsequent downloads will go there automatically.

Note;- I haven�t tried J���.if any of you have any issues let me know.

One day I sent a letter to my boss asking for an increase in my salary!!! Dear Bo$$

Your$ $incerely,
$hriram De$hpande


The next day,I recieved this letter of reply :Dear $hriram,

This is a very funny thing.Check it out……

What If you find it very boring in the office? here are some tips…….Try it!

I am not responsible if ur FIRED!!

Here u go………. ……… ..

1. Form a detective agency to find out who is quitting next.

2. Make blank calls to your Boss.

3. Count your fingers (and toes if you still get bored).

4. Rearrange the furniture, i.e. flick someone else’s chair just to irritate him/her.

5. Send mails from ms-mail to your internet mail (and immediately Get to the internet and see who reaches first, you or your mail?) and read them there, and note down the time they take to reach there. Then do vice versa……. …… !!

6. Watch other people changing their facial expressions while Working and try changing your expressions also.

7. Try to stretch status meetings as longer as possible, just by Asking silly doubts.

8. Have work breaks in between tea.

9. Have a two hour lunch; it’s a big social occasion.

10. Read jokes and send jokes.

11. Revise last week’s newspaper.

12. Hold “How fast my computer boots” competitions.

13. Practice aiming the coffee cup into the dustbin.

14. Compile “How to waste your day”

15. Pick up phone and dial non existing nos.

16. Make faces at strangers in office.

17. Count maximum no of applications your computer can open at time.

18. For Win NT/95 users….Move things to Recycle bin and restore them..Then repeat this process.

19. Look at someone & try to imagine how(s) he might have looked when(s) he was 5 years old.

20. Learn to whistle.

21. Make full use of the comfortable chair and table provided and Take a nap.