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25. February 2009

Mindset !

As my friend was passing by an elephant, he suddenly stopped, confused by
the fact that these huge creatures were being held by only a small rope
tied to their front leg. No chains, no cages. It was obvious that the
elephants could, at anytime, break away from the ropes they were tied to
but for some reason, they did not. My friend saw a trainer nearby and asked
why these beautiful, magnificent animals just stood there and made no
attempt to get away.

“Well,” he said, “when they are very young and much smaller we use the same
size rope to tie them and, at that age, it’s enough to hold them. As they
grow up, they are conditioned to believe they cannot break away. They
believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free.” My
friend was amazed. These animals could at any time break free from their
bonds but because they believed they couldn’t, they were stuck right where
they were.

Like the elephants, how many of us go through life hanging onto a belief
that we cannot do something, simply because we failed at it once before? So
make an attempt to grow further…. Why shouldn’t we try it again?

“YOUR ATTEMPT MAY FAIL, BUT NEVER FAIL TO MAKE AN ATTEMPT.”

10. February 2009

Full Form of OBAMA – Lol

OBAMA

O- Originally
B – Born in
A – Africa to
M – Manage
A – America

08. February 2009

Layoff and how it happens !!

Once upon a time the government with Ruling Party XYZ.. had a vast scrap
yard in the middle of a desert.
Ruling Party XYZ Said.. – “Someone may steal from it at night.”

So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job.
Then Ruling Party XYZ Said..

– “How does the watchman do his job without instruction?”

So they created a planning department and hired two people, one person to
write the instructions, and one person to do time studies. Then Ruling
Party XYZ Said..,

– “How will we know the night watchman is doing the tasks correctly?”

So they created a Quality Control department and hired two people. One to
do the studies and one to write the reports. Then Ruling Party XYZ Said.. ,

– “How are these people going to get paid?”

So they created the following positions, a time keeper, and a payroll
officer, then hired two people. Then Ruling Party XYZ Said..,

Who will be accountable for all of these people?”

So they created an administrative section and hired three people, an
Administrative Officer, Assistant Administrative Officer, and a Legal
Secretary. Then Ruling Party XYZ Said..,

– “We have had this command in operation for one year and we are $18,000
over budget, we must cutback overall cost.”

So they laid off the night watchman.

06. February 2009

A funny proposal letter by a South Indian

Madam:                                                                     

I am an olden young uncle living only with myself in Thiruvananthapuram. Having seen your advertisement for marriage purposes, I decided to press   myself on you and hope you will take me nicely. I am a soiled son from inside Kerala. I am nice and big, six foot tall and  six inches long. My body is filled with hardness, as because I am working  hardly. I am playing hardly also. Especially I like cricket and I am a  good  batter and I am fast baller. Whenever I come running in for balling, other batters start running. Everybody is scared of my rapid balls that bounce a lot.                                                                       

I am very nice man. I am always laughing loudly at everyone. I am a jolly  gay. Especially ladies, they are saying I am nice and soft. I am always  giving respect to the ladies. I am always allowing ladies to get on top.   That is how nice I am. I am not having any bad habits. I am not drinking and I am not sucking tobacco or anything else. Every morning I am going to the gym and I am pumping like anything. Daily I am pumping and pumping. If you want you can come and see how much I am pumping the dumb belles in the gym..  I am having a lot of money in my pants and my pants are always open for  you.                                                                       

I am such a nice man, but still I am living with myself only.

What to do? So I am taking things into my own hands everyday. That is why  I  am pressing myself on you, so that you will come in my house and take my   things into your hand. If you are marrying me madam, I am telling you, I   will be loving you very hard every day. In fact, I will stop pumping dumb  belles in the gym. If you are not marrying me madam and not coming to me, I will press you  and  press you until you come. So I am placing my head between your nicely smelling feet and looking up with lots of hope. I am waiting very badly for your reply and I am stiff with anticipation. 

Expecting soon,                                                            

Yours and only yours Kutty