27. July 2007

Want a good laugh ;-) Presenting Little Johnny

A teacher asks her class if anyone could use the word ‘indefinitely’ in
a sentence. Little Johnny raises his hand at the back of the class.

But the teacher knows he’s a trouble maker and that he doesn’t know the
answer. So, she calls on Jim.

Jim replies, “Due to the weather, school was canceled indefinitely.”

“Good” the teacher replies. “What about you Jenny?”

Jenny says, “Since the bus broke down, transportation has been stopped
indefinitely.”

The teacher then says that the sentence was too much like the other one,
and asks if anyone can use it in a different way.

So
there’s Little Johnny waving his hand again. And the teacher thinks…
(Maybe he really does know the answer), so she calls on him.

Johnny stands up and says,

“As I felt my balls slap against your ass, I knew that I was in,
definitely!”



One day little Johnny was doing his math homework. Hesaid to himself, “Two plus five, that son of a bitch is

seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine….”

His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, “What

are you doing Johnny?” The little boy answered, “I’m

doing my math homework, Mom.” “And this is how your

teacher taught you to do it?” The mother asked. “Yes,”

he answered. Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher

the next day, “What are you teaching my son in math?”

The teacher replied, “Right now, we are learning

addition.” The mother asked, “And are you teaching them

to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four? “After

the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, “What I

taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is

four.”


The teacher says, “Okay, class, we’re going to play a game today. I
want everyone to give me a sentence with the word ‘perhaps’ in it.”

Claude says, “Perhaps if we are good, the teacher won’t give us any homework.”

The teacher says, “Very good, Claude.”

Mary says, “The sky is very dark… perhaps it’s going to rain.” The teacher says, “Very good, Mary.”

She calls on Little Johnny in the back.

Johnny
says, “Yesterday, when I got home from school, my sister and her music
teacher both had their pants down to their ankles. Perhaps they were
gonna pee on the piano.”




Little Johnny once asked his teacher “Do hearts have legs?.”
The teacher answered “Why do you ask that?”

Johnny replied “Yesterday, I heard my dad say sweetheart open your legs.”


As daily habit litte Johnny was reading newspaper.

Suddenly he asked his father, “Dad! What does it mean by ‘Governance System’?”
Its
Like…”, father said while thinking, “See! I earn and bring Money to
home, mean’s I am a ‘Money Holder’. Your mother decides where and how
to spend that money and that means she is ‘Government’. That maid in
our home is doing all the household works, so she will be ‘Labour
Class’. You are a ‘Common man’ or ‘Public’.Your kid brother is ‘Future’
or the ‘Next Generation’, understand?”.

That day Johnny slept with all those thoughts.

In
the middle of the night he woke-up because his kid brother was crying.
He wetted the matresses so he was crying.Johnny went to wake-up his
mother. She was in deep sleep so Johnny went to the Maiden’s room to
wake her up. But there his father was sleeping. So he came back with
frustration.

Next morning father asked Johnny, ” Hey Johnny! You understood the ‘Governance System’? “.

Johnny
replied, ” Yeah Dad, I understood! When money Holder is exploiting
Labour Class, our Government is sleeping. Future of our nation is
crying For not getting their basic needs fulfilled and in all this
Common Man Is suffering!”

3 Comments

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1. Ruri @ business education From INDONESIA (INDONESIA) Wrote on 27. July 2007 at 1:06 pm

Lol, thanks for sharing, this is funny. Where do you get this?

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2. hem From HONG KONG (HONG KONG) Wrote on 27. July 2007 at 1:35 pm

i got this on scribd.com is guess.

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3. Lotro From MALAYSIA (MALAYSIA) Wrote on 30. July 2007 at 11:22 am

Haha! These are really funny and I have never seen them before.

Good stuff.

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