Memo to all staff:
In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from employees,
it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through our  program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T)
We  are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T than anyone else. If you feel  that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T on the course,
please see your  supervisor. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H..I.T list, and our supervisors are especially skilled at seeing you get
all the S.  H. I. T. you can handle.
Employees who don’t take their S. H. I.T. will be placed in   DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS ( D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T).
Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T seriously will have to go  to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T ).
Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they don’t have to take S.H.I.T anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T already…
If you are full of S.H.I.T, you may be interested in a job teaching others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of
LEADERS  (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T).
For  employees who are intending to pursue a career in management  and consulting,  we will refer you to the department of :
MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T).
 
This  course emphasizes how to manage M.O.R.E . S.H.I.T
 
If  you have further questions, please direct them to  our HEAD OF TEACHING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T).
       Thank  you,
      BOSS  IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (B.I.G.S.H.I.T)
   
P.S.  Now send this S.H.I.T to 5 people who need S.H.I.T in their life
 
Thank  you for your time.
Sincerely,
The Director Under the Main Bureau of Super High Intensity Training. (The D.U.M.B.S.H.I.T).